Something wonderful

The most human thing I've ever done is give birth.

Actually, when my daughter came into this world it was apparent that she was in no hurry to arrive and my body was not of the mind to give her up so easily. They had to do a c-section and extract her from her safe (albeit snug) place.

There is something so visceral - so primitive about birthing. Even if I would've wanted to control how this birth went, it wasn't possible. Creation takes over.

There is such intensity of physical pain and emotional pleasure all mixed up together - with the goal of producing something wonderful. The funny thing is, what we as humans produce is more humanity! Wonderful?

We sweat and toil and hurt and plead and cry and laugh and when we're finished - there's a smaller version of us- crying and complaining and growing.

It must be wonderful then. Maybe the reason most people love babies so much is that it gives them a chance to hold humanity close. To care for a little one is also caring for ourselves perhaps; touching that very human part of us and saying, "It's ok to be weak and out of control. Somehow - we are ok."

I loved that time - holding my little girl and at the same time holding myself.